Excerpt from a letter to my therapist:
Anyway, the reason why I stopped
calling you, and the reason for the void, wasn’t so much antipathy as just a
total lack of interest. I’d sunk so much into it for so long, and when it
finally felt you were sort of coming around I was just too tired to care
anymore. So I pretty much felt like a blank slate. No real feelings about
anything. And, it is somewhat true what that person said about you on Craig’s
list.
But anyway, I realized it was pretty silly of me to just cut you off. You’re a
little obsessive in your opinions, but at least you’ve got strong opinions.
We’re passionate about the same kinds of things. And you really did mean it
when you said you wanted our relationship to go on as long as it takes you
said. I don’t know. You’ve been silly, and weird, and obsessive, manipulative,
and condescending. But still. You are worth it, and I apologize.