When you see exhibit A (below), you will understand how I had no choice but to send the following email to the entire staff at McBone, which is apparently a famous advertising firm in New York City.
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Dear Joe et al,
I cannot say who it is at your company because I have only the IP address to go on. But I suspect it is either Tim, Corey, Chris, Doug, Scott, and especially Leon. Exhibit A Which takes one to the following bit of smutty material, which I definitely had nothing to do with. The culprit could, of course, be any one of your sex-minded interns. But I am certain it is either Donna, Jill, Casey, Emily, Lesley, Maria, or Lisa. Unless I have sorely misjudged them. Nevertheless, I am sure you will agree the time for forgiveness is now. We are all humans here. We all have our limitations, needs, frailties. I do, however, believe a more strict policy of internet policing must be instituted if we are to keep ‘McBone’ on the high moral footing it currently enjoys. We cannot turn our backs on the values and standards laid down by our glorious predecessors. We cannot let ourselves give in to each and every fleshy temptation and lurid fantasy that presents itself. Even in your weakest hours, we must find strength. I prescribe the following: 1. No more ‘ecstasy’ for McBone interns. I don’t care how much they protest and make idle threats of switching over to that firm across the street. They need you as much as you need them. And they definitely don’t need X.Exhibit B (much too late) “We’re radio directors, and we take our creative position from sound and then kind of back our way into the lines,” says McHale. “But radio is naked,” he cautions.Except of course, sin. But remember, forgiveness. We’re all radio directors here.
Yours Truly, |